Panic

“You know you ain’t going nowhere,
You’re stuck inside while the mind is flying.
You said you’d help me in the morning,
Twisting on pins into my eyes
And dragging on the ceiling below you,
Fixing up the walls with your crooked hands
While you’re miles away, miles away, miles away.

I didn’t think it’ll all end up like this,
There’s spiders on the wall and they stink of piss.
Dead heads lying in the corner
Staring at me making me feel bad.
I put my hands up to my eyes
But the holes in my palms let me find a way
To corner you, corner you, corner you.

I can feel my chest crushing inwards,
Sucking through my skin into my brain.
Oxygen pushing on the window,
Cracks in the glass, let it slip away.
I start to cry and I keep on laughing,
I close my eyes at what’s left inside
And then I’ll run away, run away, run away.

Razor blades floating in the warm bath,
Air bubbles in your veins turning my hands black,
Whispers coming from the next room,
Window cleaner keep on spying.
I put my hands up to my eyes
But the holes in my palms let me find a way
To corner me, corner me, corner me.

Twelve tonnes hammer for my breakfast
Slipping off the edge in catatonic blood.
Multiple decibel inscriptions
Trying all they can in miles an hour.
All face grey and looming downwards,
Sniffing all the time for a ounce of silence
Screaming all the way, all the way, all the way.

Numbers counting down inside me,
Solar System thoughts circle round my head.
False teeth hanging from the ceiling,
Feet looking of the goms of the second son.
I eat my hands ‘cause my legs are crying.
You broke my neck ‘cause I snapped my spine.
I wish you would die away, die away, die away.

For all the time in this land
And all the time in my hand
Slip around in depth found,
Calmness fall once again,
Once again, once again,
Once again, once again,
Once again.”

[ Panic - Anathema ]

I think this work is one of those in which the visual aspect is most closely connected both with the lyrics and the music of the song I wanted to turn into a photo. Not only did I want to represent the mental chaos of the lyrics, but I also wanted to portray the desperate frenzy of the melody.
I may guess that the general idea for this visual rendition of Panic came from these two photos, in particualr the second with the shattered glass. I immediately noticed the expressive power of such heterogenous overlayed photos and, when I subsequently listened to the song, the idea stuck and I knew that was what I wanted for it.
I’m quite positive I would have had much more fun making such a picture with analogic tools, but the digital process was interesting as well: I shot all the textures I used that same day, and they include a blurry window with shut blinds and a brick wall, a building, tree branches, more windows, a spider I found on a poster, a bus stop sign with arrows, more photos of Shinichi and a couple of blurry takes of the basic photo. It took me a lot of work to effetively assemble all the parts, so perhaps I did nothing less than what I would have done in a darkroom (the only difference is that in Photoshop I could easily correct any misstep or mistake).
I can say I’m fully satisfied with this experiment, both on its own and in relation to the concept. I’m going to play with overlayed photos again in the future (as soon as I find some fitting concept, I don’t want to do that just for the sake of it).

This is the final shot from the session with Shinichi, now you can expect something totally different from my next session.